It's X'mas..

Without the merry mood...

Anyways..

Merry X'mas to all..

By the way..

Introducing my new son...

My boy boy....

I love you baby...

School's out today...
And guess what..
I missed my last lesson before the holidays..
Not intentionally all thanks to my headache..
My head is like still spinning now...
Grrr..
Bb coming over to stay tml so he'd be going to my uncle's house with me on Sunday...
Supposed to come today...
But he got Judo training and his cousin's birthday today..
I so need my antidote..
But he isn't free...
Haix..

Guess i can only depend on myself now...

..................................................................................................................................................

My hong Kong trip gone....

Sad....

My pay cheque cannot get through...

Fark....

...........................................................................

Happy for ah min and Cassandra...

Found the love of your lives..

:)

Happy dating....

Gave up the certification course thingy...
Cause i've got no money... :(

Hi Hong Kong...
Change of plans AGAIN...
Will be in Singapore on my birthday...
But leaving the next day for Hong Kong...
Thanks to baby's mum...
She was the one who talked about going to Hong Kong instead of the 2 of us going to Malaysia..
My expenses i guess all settled...
Baby say i don't have to think so much about that and that he has enough for both of us...
I hope so...But i better work more this month so i have extra on me...
Haven't really told my mum my decision yet...
I as a daughter asked her for pemission to go...
But i don't think she had to talk to me in that manner..
She said she dono what we are thinking of...
And ask me to decide for myself and tooot...
Hung up the phone...
Mum..Are you angry that i am going overseas with my bf's family during the chinese new year period..
Or are you just sian that you have to do everything yourself during that period...
SIAN AH.....

Remembered the wrong for Baby's chalet...It's 26th to 28th instead...
And i asked my mum if they want to go..
She didn't give me definite answer but..
I guess she might go...
After that night i think really..
Things have changed for the better...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One silly thing that made me freaking pek chek last nite..
All i ever wanted was to spend my 21st birthday my way...
We wanted to go Batam..
But she said it's "dirty"...
And i asked her about Bali
But she said it's near CNY and why should i go let people chop head...
I nv wanted any grand celebrations..
I don't even expect anyone..(in the family) to want to celebrate for me..
To me..It's just another day..
But since i have someone i love that is much closer to me now..
I want it to be a very simple and private affair..
What's so hard about that?
She simply just won't let me have it my way for once don't she...
Haix...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
6 Sigma lesson today..
Now then i realise i have already skipped it 8 times
And i can no longer afford to skip anymore...
I went into the classroom..
Sat at the middle table..
LIKE AN IDIOT...
And the stupid faci took soooooo darn long to shift me into a team...
I won't mind if i was sitting in a corner or there's someone with me at the table..
But middle table and all alone...
I hate looking like an idiot...
DARN...
Walked to the mrt with Majella, Daniel and Junior..
Was laughing like hell almost the whole time...
Majulah Singapura....Majella Singapura..
To think they can think of such things..
I bet Majjy is cursing me if she reads this...
Don't kill me Majjy...
Mrt all the way after Majjy alighted, with the guys..
Went to AMK hub...
Had wanted to get a pair of heels for work..
But i couldn't make up my mind..
So..off i go..
To the outside of hub...
And saw this little trinket cupboard...
It's pink and i thought of my niece and Baby's sister...
To play safe...I bought one first..
Show my mum before deciding if we want to get that for my niece too...
2 X'mas gifts settled....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A small little change in my life...
Think slowly my family is accepting him..
I'm glad i made him stay over the other night... :)
He came to my house for dinner on Friday and we went out to Boat Quy for Dexter's birthday..
But left pretty early cause i was freaking tired...
Went back to my house to sleep..
On the same mattress and with my mum on the other mattress beside me and my dad snoring away on his bed...
Woke up the next day by my 2 little monsters..
And he..
I guess he sort of mixed into my family..
He played with them..
And brought them out(with me of course)
Wasn't a very happy outing thanks to my spoilt nephew..
Who simply can't keep his mouth shut..
And he threw the ball too hard at the arcade and hit my boy at his nose..
My boy lost his cool of course..
Rang up the monsters' dad and asked him to pick us up...
Back at the house..
Dinner together and my mum gave him a lecture after dinner..
Half an hour lecture that is...
But it was a good one...
My mum talked to him about a lot of things..
Which majority of it i wasn't listening to..
But really..
Was good interaction..
I guess my mum knew that he wasn't a bad guy..
Went on to our mahjong session...
a "healthy family game"..
As what my sis in law said...
We paid a school fee of $1.20..
That boy of mine don't even know when to game without me by his side..
Silly...
Went out to EZ after the game and this time round stayed at his house...
I was supposed to work the next day...
But i feigned sickness..
Reason #1 : Didn't have the mood to go to work..
Reason #2 : I just wanted more time with him...
I lost the money but i gained more time with him...
Spent the whole day with him and went home after sending him back to camp...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
December already..
That would only mean a number of events happening...
on the 10th...our 6th month anniversary...
How time flies..... :)
27th to 29th boy's birthday chalet...
The actual is on the 30th but he'd be in camp... Sad... :'(
I just hope he wouldn't need to go into DB and will be able to book out for his birthday...
Next next next...
My 21st birthday....
I should be out of town..
Boy already applied for leave
On the actual day i guess i'd be out of reach...
21st to 23rd..
But we don't know where to go yet...
So...
Any suggestions???
Yea..
That's it...

I realise my blog have been very very full of words......Hence....

Shall put up some pictures...

My Darling niece...

I'm not the mother for goodness sake..

Though she does look like me when i was young..

Damn those aunties...
Do i look like a mum to you??!!

I know......I sould never cam-whore during working hours...Especially in the toilet..But i can't help it...IT'S FERAKING BORING!!!!



Fuck the eyebags...Geez...

My Boy and his Sister....

Mindgames??!!

Purpose of the hearts is not to show my love for him..

It's just to hide his nippies...

Before someone comes after me for posing indecent photographs..

Creation of Charmaine during Pharma class..

And no..this sotong head looks nothing like me..

But it's cute....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

I skipped my Retail UT 3 today...

Had wanted to go..

But don't see the point to rush to school just to take my UT..

Not going to school tml either...

Retail module again...

I've got doctor appointment at Tan Tock Seng...

Shall go to Baby's house early tml morning..

And SLEEP...

Yes...To sleep..

And have him accompany me to the doctor and off to buy my shoes for work...

My heels like broke yesterday while i was going for my dinner break..

Damn malu can..

And the stupid woman do nothing but said "Oh Dear"..

I think you could have helped just by shutting up...

Could have made do without your comments thank you..

Don't ask me how i broke it..

I really have no idea..

Walked halfway and "piak"..

Off it went..

So auntie Jocelyn helped me pluck the other side out..

And i went from walking...to shuffling the rest of the day..

Helped Chee Keong with his perfume sets...

Wrapped them with ribbons...

Made alot of "balls" or whatever u call them...

and i had the rest of the promoters asking me to make for them..

I bet the whole sales floor is full of my "balls"...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Boy is out riding his bicycle again..

I wonder if he could even open his eyes tml..

Got this feeling that i'd be going alone at the end of the day to the doctors...

Am pondering over what to give him for his birthday next month..

Though he says it's alright to not have any gift as long as i'm beside him..

But it doesn't make sense for me to go empty handed right...

I expect something big on my 21st from him..

Hee hee...

Better not pin high hopes else i'd be very disappointed by then...

Guess i'll hand make some placard for him since i'm kinda poor...

Hmmm...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Keep having this urge to go for the SIA interview again..

COX i really don't know what kind of job i should go for...

HAix..

Wad should i do?

I need to find a job....
Right after i graduate...
Zz...

Went Dbl O last sat after hubby's daddy's birthday celebration...
And met yx and hw there...
Haix...
Nothing to say about that...
Had a mixture of feelings...
Was happy that i met them..
But unhappy due to a whole string of incidents that happened...
So tired of life....
Kena viral infection last week and went to school for like only 1 day...
Never even go for my FYP....
For the first time i felt so horrible..
And yet no one bothered..
Not even my parents...
My bf can't book out and i'm left there..
Dangling...
Barely alive...
Worked on Sunday...
Freaking tired..
I was like a wlking zombie..
First thing my mum did was to kp me when i reached home..
Half dead..
And the next thing i know when i open my eyes..
My dad kp me..
As much as i wanted to rest at home..
I didn;t...
I left the house..
Not wanting to hear more rantings from my parents...
And i';m so hungry...
I guess everyone's left their classes already.....
Haix..
I want my pooh bear with me...

Geez...
I feel so shitty..
Kena flu..
And my whole body is ching like shit..
Plus headache..
So much that i skipped school and my UT..
Better still..
SCM UT...
The only module that i got D+ for my first UT...
Fark sia..
Baby's not feeling well either...
His back is pain and he couldn't even turn..
He was to come to my house to look for me..
But ended up..
Never...
Both of us sick..
Wonder wad's wrong with the both of us..
Tml FYP somemore...
Zz..

Happy Anniversary Baby...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Having problems with my fucked up lappy..
Stupid free antiviruses
They are of NO USE...
Thought could uninstall them but end up cannot...
Thought nvm...
MAYBE they would stay there quietly..
But i was wrong
TOTALLY WRONG...
They popped out at the wrong time...
WORSE..
THEY KEEP POPPING UP..
Someone tell me how to get rid of this annoying stuff???
HAIX......
UT tml again..
SI BEH SIAN AH...
Today's Pharma UT confirm buang..
Heng UT 1's result not so bad....
But tml SCM UT...
DIE...

I haven't been going to school again this week..
I guess my friends are too used to not seeing me already..
And yes i know..i missed out alot on the lessons..
Hve my 6 Sigma UT later..
Opened up the 6ps and gosh...
I know nuts..
But nvm..
Still going for the UT...
At least got a grade..
*****************************************
Have been keeping a look out for jobs already..
I'm totally at lost..
I don't what i want..
Geez...
Tot of going to another airline to try..
But the thought of my boy..forget it...
Tot of going for jobs at nightspots..
But..Thinking of both my parents and my boy..
Might not work out...
Someone tell me what to do...
Haix.....
************************************

Caught the movie "The Coffin" yesterday at TM..

It kinda sucks..

Boy was bored to like duh..

And i keep getting shocks from the stupid sound effects..

It wasn't really scary but gross..

And i can't stand the sight of the actors with the horrible make ups..

Will have night mares..

But still..

Like a typical girl..

I hid under the jacket most of the time before the "things" even came out..

And boy was like teasing and laughing at me throughout...

Shit him...

**************************************
Came across this email that a friend sent me...

Doctor's Last Word....
A 20-yr old pretty, sexy and sensual girl went to see a psychiatrist.
'Doctor, I'm so angry at my boyfriend that I must call him Bastard. I
feel that he's gone too far, and he deserves it.'
'Hmm? Such a word is strong and rude. But may be you have your own
reasons. Tell me about it so that I can help you.'
'Yes, thank you, Doctor. There was one night...we parked our car
besides the beach and we were alone... and... he held my hand....'
'Did he hold your hand like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're holding it now'
'If it's only this, he doesn't deserve to be called Bastard. It means
he doesn't want to be separated from you.'
'Then, he leaned his body towards me... and hugged me...'
'Like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're doing.'
'It's not a Bastard.
It means he wanna stay forever by your side'
'Then he kissed me...'
'Like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're kissing me.'
'If its only a kiss like this, seriously you can't call him Bastard.
it means he adores you.'
'Then he put his hands inside my clothes and touched my boobs, Doc...'
'Like this?'
'Yes, Doctor... exactly like that'
'It's not behavior of a bastard. It means he wants to protect you.'
'Then he took off all my clothes... slowly... '
'Did you resist?'
'No. I let him do it, coz I love him...'
'Did he take off your clothes like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Until I'm completely naked like now......'
'He still doesn't deserve to be called 'Bastard, because it means he
wanna learn about your body completely.'
'Then he kissed me and put his.... inside me and had sex with me...'
.......................
'Did he do it just like what we do?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly the same'
'You still can't call him Bastard. It means he needs you.'
'But then he told me that he has AIDS'
All the staff and patients outside heard the doctor screaming,'
BASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRD!'

I screwed up at my SIA interview on Friday..

Kinda paiseh to say..

But yes..

I was ousted at the first round..

Geez..

My group was kinda strong..

All ang moh damn power..

I was alright even before i went into the room..

But i went all jittery when it was my turn to introduce myself and answer their question..

The qn: What do you think is the most important aspect in customer service?

All our answers were like the same..

But the 2 that got selected..

They told stories and they got in..

Geez..

It wasn't that hard actually but i guess if i had more confidence and be able to express myself properly..

It shouldn't have been a problem..

While waiting for my turn..

I looked around..

Tried to smile at the other girls waiting..

But they seem...Unfriendly..

And that's it...

Huiwen is asking if i want to try Silkair..But that's like next year?

Hmm..

Maybe i could consder other airlines...

But i guess my boy would be damn happy if i have up this choice for good..

Colleagues are asking me to keep trying..

Especially my manager who is an Ex-SIA girl herself..

"Keep trying no matter what.."

Sounds easy huh..But needs alot of courage leh dey...

Perhaps at the end of the day...

Tgis is just not my cup of tea..

Since it was never my dream nor my ambition... :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's tuesday and it's been a week and a day after she left this world...

Her news came out so big in the papers and yet we never saw it..

I didn't even know till Yuxin called me in the middle of the night on Thursday..

She passed away...Horribly..

That is seriously like no way a girl like her should pass on..

I remember the time when i first saw her in secondary school years ago..

She was that very very innocent little girl..

And she grew up fast..

And now...

This has to happen..

I was never close to her..

But we talked...

She's a friend to me..

I was stuned when i heard about her death..

But we have to accept it..

I wonder how her family is coping...

Supposed to go with Yuxin to madai to pay my respects..

But i had chalet the nite before..

But tt's an excuse..

I simply can't bring myself to go there..

Don't know why..

I just never liked to attend such things..

Anyway...

Rest in Peace girl..

Elizabeth Yau

27th October 2008....

http://forums.hardwarezone.com.sg/showthread.php?t=2142168

Blah Blah

In 15 hours in should in the room along with a few other girls facing a small challenge in life...

Or a big one to some others.. :)

A little jittery now...

It's either a straight route or another ambigious route after today....

My baby just called and said he regretted asking me to try..

And asked if i could don't go for the interview..

My answer: Can i say no?

Not that i want this job more than i want a life with him..

But if i don't go, i might really regret in future...

Think of the money..

Think of the experiences..

Think...What kind of job would pay you to see the world?

Though i think i'd most likely not get through even the first phase...

But...Haiz...Just a try darling..

Don't get in and i'll just accept it as i'm not fated to be in that line..

Should go to sleep already..

Or i'd really look like a zombie tomorrow..

Wish me luck and to Kah Mun too.. *Winkx

Oh my...
Scary sia...
Geez..
Did they just schedule anyone who sent in an application or did they really choose..
Sia la..
Should go for plastic surgery before going..
4pm..
A little late..
But good also..
Hee hee...
Directly opposite Baby's house...

by the way the bloggie add has changed to http://poohlovespiglet-10062008.blogspot.com

I wonder if i'm right about this..

Heeded Kah Mun's advice to submit the pplication for SIA..

Ya la i know..

I look nothing like a Singaporeair Girl...

But what she said made sense..

Never have regrets..

Submitted my application already..

And guess what i saw..

5 ah?

I only passed 3???!!!!

God..

Duh....

See how's my luck la..

See if they reply..

Reply..Go..

Don reply..

SUA~

hahaha!

Told Bb..

He sounds..

disappointed..

He said he'll be damn sad if i got in...

And worried that some other guy might come in between..

B..

Do trust me or don trust the guys...

Ask ur heart..

U told me u don trust the other guys..

But think..

Even if someone thinks of something else..

But my heart is with u..

And u still say u don trust the guys?

When i cldn't possibly have change of heart?

Haix....

FUCK SCHOOL!!!

CB...

Don engage useless staff can..

Bloody hell...

Submitted form already still come after me for school fees...

Reply back to them that i have already submitted like long ago..

And only to have a reply saying..

According to our records, we have not received your form....

$#^%$&^%*&^(

CCB...

HENG I GOT TAKE EXTRA FORM HOME...

NABEI...

Deadline 20th OCT..

I nv take tt means i cham la..

SACK YOUR USELESS STAFFS U RUBBISH SCHOOL....

My bro's going back to Aussie tml night..
Gve up meeting Bb for my brother..
Which i really should...
Cause i see my bro like once for dono how long....
Bb booked out already..
Went to see him just now..
Just for a while and he went out riding his bike...
So..
Alone i went...To Cityhall..
He thought i went home when in fact i didn't..
Went to eat at Makansutra first..
The flies were fucking irritating...
Duh...
But nevermind them...
Walked over to Marina Square to walk walk see see..
Quite a number of SALES going on..
But cannot buy..
WHY?
Cox my pocket is empty...
Nevermind that too..
It's a Friday..
And i am attached..
Yet i'm walking around all alone...
Can't blame anyone but myself...
Seeing those couples walking past me make me envy..
Not that i don't have a Significant Other..
But simply just i told him..
If you want to ride...Go and ride..
I'll find my own entertinment..
He realises that i went walking around lone only when i was nearly reaching home...
He said it made him feel bad..
I'm sorry f u really did...
But seriously i'm okay alone..
As much as i hoped for him to be by my side..
I won't be so selfish to tie him to myself..
And i know he's not the kind of walk walk see see guy...
He's more like n arcade guy..
A place where i seldom go to before i met him..
Now..I've become a regular...A regular standee...
Standing down there, occasionally sitting on chair beside him..
Watching him play or stoning there...
HAix...
He knows i don't like it..
Cox i've been showing my sulty face everytime we walk into an arcade...
Haix...
Actually i don't mind going..
But tht is if i am also playing..
He tries to get me involved...
Playing phtohunt with me sometimes..
But it doesn't help that he isn't even paying attention to the screen in front of us..
Dear...If you wan to play..give your full attention...
It simply spoils my mood and then yours when ur finger is here at the screen but ur eyes and heart is with the "cars".....

Haix...
Nuff said...

Ramble~~

WAAAAA~~~~

Liong ah liong ah..

I freaking need more money....

I fucking need more jobs...

Ahhhh.......

Any lobangss????!!!!

Duh...

Didn't go to school today cox kena gastric last night..

Bear with it the whole night till 3.30am..

Cannot tahan anymore...

Went to the toilet..

And..

VIOLA~~~~

What a beautiful sight...

MY PUKE!!!

Red one sia..

Got chao sng taste sia..

Freaking bitter sey..

Think it was the chilli i ate...

Bahhhhh~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the way..

I've got another blog..

For me and my boyfriend..

It's..

http://pandalovespiglet-10062008.blogspot.com

I know i know...

Sounds kiddish..

But cute WAD!

:P

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

I'm Happy...

WHY???

#1 Tml no nid to go LTH...

#2 I'm done setting up the bloggie(though it doesn't take up much time)

And I'm Unhappy...

WWWHHHYYY????

#1 I'm broke...fucking broke...

#2 I'm feeling quesy...my stomach is in a war..

#3 I haven't watch the VCD i bought 1,2 week go..

#4 The cuckoo haven't tell me my application for my school fees approved already anot...

#5 WHY I HAVEN'T GRADUATE FROM SCHOOL????!!!!

Went for Jerlyn's R.O.M yesterday..

Very nice place..

Wasn't very grand, but it's great enough for them.. :)

The heart shaped balloons~

The music..

The atmosphere was nice..

I was wondering why would nyoe hold an R.O.M at a chalet..

But after this, it's not a bad thing afterall.. :)

A pity i missed the solemnisation part...

The ending part was great..

Saw how the couple danced..

Though could tell they were a little paiseh,perhaps cause there are elders around..

But still nice...

They were supposed to be the main attraction but seems like a kid stole all the limelight..

The new age DANCING KING~ :)

Cute boy~

My boy started asking when's our turn..

Good question..

Not that i don't want to..

But it's simply too early..

And what do we have to be able to get hitched?

No money no talk..

This is the real world...

U can't fill your stomach with LOVE..

But i didn't tell him that...

I said:

"No flowers, No diamond Ring, No proposal and u want me to marry u.."

And his reply...

"Ok...U say one~Next month...You wait..."

Yea...I'll wait...

I may or my not nod my head..

Even though i did already..

TWICE..

Saying is not enough darling...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Can't believe my Saturday is gone just like that...

Haven't gone clubbing for ages and now...MOS had closed down..

Zz..

Don't tell me there's still Phuture..And a whole list of clubs out there..

Tht was like the first club(other than Devil's Bar) that i went to..

Got memories sia..

Sian ah...

Should have gone to work just know if i had known i'd be spending the whole day at home...

Fully blur, half asleep and half awake..

I HATE THIS...

Should have agreed to work..

Y am i so dunb?

Duh...

My life is like Zz..Dead..

I kinda miss my previous lifestyle...

Though i didn't have a love interest then..

But i was happy..

Though with trouble too..

Not that i'm not happy now..

But the worries piled up..

Haix..

So tired..

So vexed.

Can i just go to bed, off my handphone...And sleep for a few days straight?

Can i ?

Must you keep going out..

Just a call and out you go..

ARGH!!!!!!

PEK CHEK AH!

Sometimes i just wish to get out of the house sooner..

Told baby just now and his reply...

Get married lol...

Haiz..Do you see marriage as a game?

I'm seriously wondering..

If i were to get pregnant..

Should i just keep the baby and get married?

Or should i get it out and move on with life...

Haix..

Jerlyn's R.O.M tml..

Wonder when would be mine...

Don't laugh..

It's normal for girl to want to get married..

Though i've always said i don't mind being left on the shelf..

But it's still a girl's dream...

~~~~~~~~~

Just wanted more time for him..

Why do you have to restrict me..

I'm old enough to think..

I'm 20..

not 12...

I know what's right and what's wrong...

I know what i'm doing...

You said as long as i'm happy..

It's okay...

Now you telling me this shit..

Giving me this kind of attitudes...

Have you got any idea that would make me want to even more leave this house...

Just give me a break..

PLEASE..

A mixture of feelings...

I'm Happy..

Cause my baby "proposed" again..

Just to get engaged..

He knows i don't want to get married so soon...

But how do i go about telling my parents..

But anyway..

I agreed..

Since it's between me and him..

~~~~~~~~~~~

And i'm sad..

Cause my brother doesn't like him..

Though he says it's not important whether he likes him or not..

My happiness is more important..

But never did he realise i'll never be happy if my family doesn't support whole heartedly..

As much i feel like i'm not really part of the family at times..

But they are still part of the reason why i'm living..

I live for myself..

I live for my baby..

I live for my family...

I'm getting emo again........

And i hate that feeling...

I just want to live a simple and happy life...

Is it that hard?...

I have 2 things to blog about..

1 happy...1 headache...

The Happy Issue...

My brother came back from Australia and gave us all a surprise..

I missed him so much.

Even though he has been a very strict brother while i was growning up all the years..

But i knew he loved me..

:)

I'm his only sister afterall..

It should have been a happy occasion..

But here comes the headache part..

My boy's angry with me AGAIN...

REASON?

Cause i left his house without him..

He agreed to accompany me to have dinner with my family tonight..

We..or rather he..

slept till 4pm..

slacked at his livig room and end up falling asleep on the sofa...

tried to wake him up seeing the time is really getting late..

But he refused to budge..

Went to take my bath..

And he still won't move..

And i left alone without him...

Am i wrong?

I don't want everyone to wait for us like we are some big shot...

And i don't want him to have not enough rest...

Yet he doesn't understand my intentions and says that i don't understand him...

I know u want to accompany me..

But not at the expense of sacrificing ur resting time..

Haix...

Now..

He's still angry..

And i'm haveng a headache...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Baby bought another PSP..

From his friend....

$300 bucks...8gb memory card..

haix..

but he haven't paid him yet...

like duh....

Went drinking with him, danny and his girlfriend...

First at Pasir Ris Park....

Nice ambience..

But transport is bad...

Next move on to Ez 50s..

the place where Baby's dad always frequent..

And also the "club" that Jackie Chan opened....

Haix...

Drank quite alot...

Headache....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Is my freaking manager going to meet me or not...

I WAN TO SLEEP LA...

SI BEH PEK CHEK...

@$%$#^%$&$

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1 whole week without updates..

REASON:

I've got nth to update~

My life is Boring..

Yes..

BORING..

I realised i'm having this phobia towards my Retail Logistics Facilitator..

Like OH MY GOD..

For the first time in my life of 20 freaking years..

I developed a phobia towards a "teacher"???!!!!

Sounds ridiculous..

But it's true..

PErhaps it's the wy that old man stresses people..

Scary old man we have there...

Am NOT looking forward to Mondays....

BAHHHHH~~~~

BUT

I AM looking forward to the END OF THE SEMESTER...

which is like still 13 weeks away...

Someone please tell me school hasn't just started like 3 weeks ago?

DUH!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Am meeting my Baby after school tml since he's booking out...

Poor him...

Duty after Duty after Duty....

Not enough rest..

He have better not fall sick again..

Else this time i'll really collapse...

Meet him tml and let him rest on Thursday...

Shall go out with Daniel an the peeps instead then..

For Dan's birthday...

:)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Freak...

can i have my pay...

i'm fucking broke..

#$#^%$&%^&%

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TIRED AH!!

I freaking need a break can...

Am so exhausted can....

Grrr...

Tml got FYP again...

PENJURU AGAIN..

AHHHH!!!

I hate school...

Duh...

School better ends fast fast.....

***************************************

As for my problems...

Sort of half settled...

Though i'm still having headaches here and there..

Trying to find possible ways to eliminate the problems..(which seems impossible..)

****************************************

Baby have been having headaches very frequently lately...

No idea what is wrong with him..

And i simply have no chance to accompany him to see a doctor..

He is to see the doctor in camp..

But seems like other than prescribing medicatio to him..

The stupid doctor did NOTHING...

Duh....

Should ask his mum to brng him to some brain scan one day to check what is wrong with him...

High degree....

Had been a "missy" for the past few days...

Cause baby was down on fever...on and off...

nearly scared me to death when his temperature went up to 39.3...

His mum just sent him to the doctor gain and he told me he felt better after a jab..

Hopefully my baby could be active again real soon...

Hurts me to see him like that...

I know i know..

I sound like a mum..

But that's normal isn't it?

Damn tired can..

For the first time...

I freaking dozed off on the mrt on the way to school this morning..

And i nearly missed a stop...

Zz...

I am THAT tired..

Though i didn't attend school...

Haiz..

Had "free" snacks today thanks to Daniel...

Thanks to him refusing to take the money and wanting to treat us...

Heng we never really buy much..

I bought the most things and i feel bad not returning him...

Eh uncle..

I know u meant well...

Being gentlemanly...But hor...

earning money not easy leh...

Ya la..i know..

I say lidat but i keep spending money...

Dono y..

The more u make...the more u spend...

That's life...

Just bought a nude-bra from AMK...

$19.90..

Sticky sia..

But heng it comes with a strap...

finally for once i could wear my tubes without the straps..

If not damn fugly...

I've got a feeling i'll be the one down with fever next..

After baby..

Yesterday..(10th September)

was supposed to be our 3rd month aniversary..

Yes...I know...no big deal...

We spent the whole day together...

Starting from Tan Tock Seng..

Where he had his appointment for his hand fracture..

Then back to his house..

For him to rest...

He didn't eat much an really...

His body turned red when his temperature suddenly rises....

I felt damn helpless..

And damn useless...

Could do nothing but watch him suffer..

When he slept i was outside watching TV....

Either that or i slept with him..

Stayed on till his parents came back..

Had dinner...

Coached his sistera little...

And he gave me money to take cab home...

And that's how we spent our anniversary..

What a way to spend our anniversary together...

Nevermind...

3rd month gone..

But still got the 100days one..

sounds like some funeral kind of thingy but got ppl celebrate too wad..

hopefully i won't be the one falling sick...

A chat with Aloy really helped..
After all he is Baby's cousin and they have strong brotherly ties..
He's a nice guy actually..
Although he admits he's one who can't commit unlike baby..
But at least his thinking is mature enough..
As compared to baby...
Not trying to compare the two cousins...

At least i have someone whom i can talk to about baby since they grew up tgt and knew each other inside out..
At least i have someone whom can pass a message through to baby if he simply won't get what i told him into his head...
Someone to "share" my burden...
He assured me that Baby is a good guy...
I know he is...
It's the ladies around that are getting scarier....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gotta sleep already...
Meeting baby for his doctor appointment tml morning...
My troubles to be set aside for now...
Just hope things wouldn't be that complicated...
Hope she wouldn't hurt him....

She's at it again...

Didn't go home..AGAIN..

Spent the night out with baby's cousin..

What is this..

Just when she ended on fling..

She got onto another..

And i know this guy...

If it's bb's friend maybe i can still take it..

his cousin...

for goodness sake..

Bb was furious..

Dare not even look at him when he vented his anger the wall..

Felt so bad..

Shouldn't have asked her out the night before..

She slept with us at Bb's room..

She on the bed and we on the floor...

If i wasn't working i'd still be alright with them being alone..

But i was working...

Fucking no mood to work the whole day...

I should trust both of them..

I trust Bb more than i trust her..

Though i know her longer..

But given her character..

I don't know..

Something might or might not have happened between them..

I don't know..

I don't want to think...

Told Baby why i was so angry last night..

And he promised not to offer to put any other girl up..

Even if it's my best friend..

When i would not be around with them...

She came along again last night with us when Baby and i met up with his cousins again...

She was SUPPOSED to go home..

Was too tired to stay on when bb said to go home..

I trusted his cousin wouldn't do anything funny

And i entrusted him with the task to see her home..

Only to receive a call from Aloy to ask for her number..

And when she called and told me she didn't go home again..

And they are not at his house and isn't too sure where they are either.

I nearly fainted..

Could you PLEASE LOVE URSELF?

I din expect you to just sleep with a guy u met only twice...

And hello..

you have a boyfriend...

How could i ever face him again if he were to find out..

If he wouldn't find out i'd still have a serious problem trying to face him...

And the guy u slept with..

How am i to face him too.....

It was all my fault..

I couldn't even really face baby...

Shouldn't have asked her out..

And if i didn't..

These problems wouldn't be there..

Reached home at 1+ in the morning to find dad's room light still on..

He's lying on the bed and he said he isn't feeling well when i went to him...

What kind of a daughter would make her dad..

especially when age is catching up with him..

Wait for her to come home when he's not feeling well and need more rest...

I couldn't take it anymore..

I surpressed myself these 2 days..

And after these things happen...

My tears just came down without warning...

I'm a sinner..

I feel usesless....

It's said that everyone is alive for a reason..

What's mine then?

Why am i even living on this earth...

Why?

He's out again...Without me..As usual...

:'(

**********************************

School's starting tml...

HAix...

Be counting down on the days it finishes....

i want it to be done fast....

***********************************

Don't feel like talking...

Or typing anymore for now...

Bye..

I am sooo....TIRED!

work work work work...

But good also...

Better i keep spending..

BUT...

now i'm contradicting..

I just got my very very pathetic pay of a hundred over dollars..

And now..

I'm online shopping...

I ordered....

This

This...

This......

And This......

Safer tops...

Won't have him nagging at me again just because he don't like other guys to look at me..

Please la..

Not as if your gf is very pretty..

I'm a woman after all..

Got guys look at very normal wad..

Haix...

Looks like my spags can only be worn below those cardigans...

Duh.......

Oh oh oh....

And..

I want this...

Hee hee hee....

Nice fragrance...

But i no money... :(

****************************************************************

More work tml and tuesday..

And school is reopening..

There goes my holiday...

Wed or Thursstart school..

Friday,saturday and sunday working AGAIN..

Thanks to the promotion going on...

Could be staying over at Bb's house next weekend since his parents are not at home..

And since his house is nearere to Tampines...

Save my time..

Haha..

Work and get to be with my bf still..

Else he'd be complaining again...

Haven't seen him for nearly one week...

I miss his Italy again..

Duh...

Tml...

Tampines..

Sian sia!!!!!!!

Better have sales tml..

Duh....

$0 on friday...

$0 today...

If $0 again tml..

I think i gone case..

Zz....

Sleeping time!!!!

Blardy Hell...

The stupid woman gave me the red card..

Just because she assumed i can't be able to brig in sales for her...

Hello..

Don't judge people lidat can..

just because i'm quiet doesn't mean i can't work..

Never mind..

It's your loss...

Shall help out my manager to manage the counter stuff instead...

Earn lesser but i think i'd be happier..

And i get at least a day to rest.....

Facing my smiley customers is better than facing that old hag..

Yea...i sound bad...

No...I AM BAD..

But i'm just speaking from my heart...

I knew there'd be trouble the moment i saw her..

Sorry for giving Ken the trouble to find another few girls to that picky woman...

Yes.

She changed not just me..

But another too..

Out of 4..

Sha changed half..

And the event is like a few days away??

Crazy woman..

Don't care...

**************************************

Haix....

Why?WHy?WHY?

Don't remind me of school can....

Results are out and the new Time table is out...

Ow.....I just HATE school..Duh...

Introducing my last 4 modules of my polytechnic life..

Excluding FYP 2 that is...

Talking about FYP...I got a C for FYP 1...

Surprisingly...

I expected a D can...

And my GPA....SUPER BUANG!

Shan't talk about it already....

Just be glad that i passed...

Okay...

Lean Manufacturing and Six Sigma Class.... E44E...

Supply chain Management Class.....E44E.....

Retail Logistics Class....E44B...

Pharmacuetical and Bio-Chem Supply Chain Class...E44E....

Pathetic can....16 people only...Kaox....

I so need to sleep can...

Grr...

Oh yeah..

I've got a blazer for my uniform..

At least i look smarter..

Though Baby laughed at me when he saw me wearing it just now on my way home..

But i know..

I looked good in that...

okay..

BULLSHIT!!

:P

Nuff said....

I don't geddit..

I'm a person with very little words..

And what's wrong with that?

You're talkative and u expect me to talk as much..

My life's boring and i have nothing to talk about...

And what's wrong with that?

I know u're unhappy but that is a fact..

A character which i can never change...

And i'm sorry for that..

And i love you..

Preparing myself for one whole shot of 9 days of working..

For money..

I must push on...

I wanna get new fragrances...

One to be exact..

Don't have the money to get too many..

Am thinking of getting something sweet but not too strong..

Am currently using Escada's Sunset Heat..

But it seems like it's finishing real soon..

I wonder how i used it...

Hmm..

Was late for work today but who cares..

No one was there..

And i doubt anyone woud even realise even if i were to decide not to turn up after all...

Spent most of my time doing Sudoku at the counter..

More time roaming around Bishan...

Zz..Boring..

Bought a skirt at G2000 for $25..Usual was $49..

A white one that is..

Just for work..

Wonder why they need us to wear white skirt..

Duh...PAP ah...

Am thinking whether to get another one or not...

Hmm...

Den off i went to roam around somemore..

Went into SASA...

Tried a few perfumes.

I find F for fascinating by Ferragamo..

And Dream of Pink of Lacoste..

The better smelling ones..

It doesn't matter how long they've been out..

But..

Which should i choose?

Suggestions???

I needed something that can last longer..

But i realise it really depends on individual..

Not the brand of the fragrance..

So...

Which should i get..

Shall get yuxin to help me check out the prices at DFS...

Kekeke...

Off tml and sunday..

But i've got an intervew at 10 am tml morning..

After that...

I wonder should i go to Baby's house or go home first..

He's out tonight AGAIN..as usual..

And i wonder if he could wake up tml...

Don wish to go to his house and face a sleeping buddha...

He's gonna get his shoes..

And me.

Just spend some time with him before my long work schedule starts..

He'll go "kao beh"..

As usual..

Darling...I'm just trying to earn a living..

And i don't see anything wrong with that...

Am i wrong?

Hmm.....

The little voice in me...

I am SO very TIRED!

GeeZ!

I tot i'd be like rotting fot the whole of my holiday..

But looks like i'm wrong..

So.. VERY WRONG!!!

My whole holiday is PACKED...

I wonder if i could take it...

I'm so sorry to my boy that i have to work and neglect him..

But i can't help it..

Can't bring myself to turn down...

It's money ya know!!!

It's like something that we all MUST have..

I think i'm kinda scared of living a life full of monetary difficulties...

And that's why...

Boy...If only you could save?

I guess if you could i wouldn't be forcing myself to work...

Don't get the wrong idea..

I am NOT supporting my boyfriend..

I just needed money to pay my brother..

And of course..

Save money...

Grrr...

For wht you must be thinking...

Just to prepare myself if..

I mean IF...

One day i end up being all lone..

Not having a man who wants to marry me... (like duh..now what era already...)

I would have my own savings and do what ever i like.. :)

Tomorrow work at Bishan then 2 days off...

Before i embark on my sibeh tedious schedule...

Non-stop from Monday..(the 25th) all the way till 2nd Sept...

9 days right..

No big deal right..

Think of it..

A person with lots of health problems like me..

Hmm..

I wonder if i can really take it..

I'm no longer the 16year old who can one shot work all the way without even resting..

YES..

I'm old.. :(

It's sad but it's fact and i accept that fact..

Grrr....

Let's see...

25th- Junction 8...Packing up of the counter...

26th-Century Square...Travel till my butt open...

27th-Bugis Junction...Go there kill mosquito..If there is..Zz..

28th to 31st-COMEX Fair..Suntec City...Wonder if it'd be fun... Duh..

!st and 2nd not too sure whre i'm working YET...

Probably Tampines again...Baahhh....

3rd..School Re-opens..

SIAN AH!

1 more semester to go before i can get out of school completely....

Grrr....

As much as i hated school...

I think i'd miss schooling life..

Don't get me wrong..

My schooling life as in the very seng nang life in poly...

The fun times i had in secondary school...

The laughters..The talks...The "Chalet"...

I hereby pronounce.....

I miss school..

Awww....

I know..i sound fake..And i'm talking to myself again..

Baaaaaahhhhh~

Just another day..

I am soooooo tired....

I used to think that maybe i could get use to living all alone..

But i guess i was wrong about it...

These few days my parents are not round..

And when i step into the dark and empty house..

I have this very lonely feeling inside me..

Perhaps i was wrong about having that thinking...

It should be time to re-think.. :)

*****************************

Lovelorn...Thanks for being my listening "ear" when i have these whole chunk of problems stuck to my brains and i can't tell anyone else...

As for her...I guess we are all at our wits end..Even she is having problems trying to reach a decision..

It's understandable since we've somehow been through almost the same things..

But the main problem is...Making choices...

She doesn't know how to make a choice and doesn't want to force herself to make a decision..

She doesn't think she is selfish...

To her...She needs a companion..

He's been out of the country for the past few months and that was why she found herself these life buoys..

But from what we see....She isn't just treating this guy as a life buoy..

She fell for him already..

And she's stuck in between..

One is a guy whom she thinks she can live together for the rest of her life even though their feelings have faded...

Another is a guy whom she sees their future as blurry..

That's the reason why she can't make a choice..And she did mention to me that both of the guys dotes on her...

I guess there's nothing we can do now...The rest is all up to her..

I just hope she'd get out of this thing soon...

And as for my marriage to what you called my-sai-nai-cute-bf....

STILL A LONG WAY TO GO LA!

Haha...

There's no way i'm going to wear that wedding gown unless that boy's thinking gets matured nd he had enough of fun...

Running around every weekend..

And me..

Staying home while he have fun..

Shan't force things la..

We'll see how everything goes..

Who knows.. Maybe not us...But you be the one to wear tht gown first...Hee hee hee :)

*****************************

Work work work these few days...

Grr..Tiring...

Commission soooo pathetic...

Haix...

*****************************

He should be comng over for dinner tomorrow..

If he could book out.

If not...I'd be all alone again...

:) Ciaoz..

Twisted...

Supposedly a girl's night out after slightly more thn 2 months on Friday..

Baby was SUPPOSED to be at MOS and i at Phuture..

And SUPPOSSEDLY we should be having our own fun with our own friends..

Still..

Thanks to Raine...She said she wanted to go Phuture to find Jason..

That was what Baby told me anyway..

So my lesbian night is gone...

I thought i'd meet baby when it's time to go home..

Erm..

His home that is...

But ended up the whole night..

I'm stuck at a corner with him...

I wanna grind people..

Girls to be exact..

Don feel good grinding guys..

Call me a wierdo..

But that's what i am..

Haven't really enjoyed myself since i got into this relationship..

But i'm not trying to grumble here.

Night is gone...

Had a little fun maiking fun of Raine..

Think i couldn't make myself open up since i'm such a lousy dancer..

I missed "messing" around with the girls..

Geez...

Haix..

Good and Bad for the night..

The Good...

I paid only $5..

My gf paid for the rest..

So fine...I paid just to get in...

And my baby was there...

Lots of hugs..

:)

And lots of tongue fighting to tease Raine...hee hee..

The Bad..

Didn't really have fun...

The music sucks...

Went off around 2am (Ya i know it's damn early...)

Off to his house for my sleep...

Whatever happens behind close doors..

Hee hee..

Ask me if u wanna know.. :P

Went to Tampines Mall with his family the next day for grocery..

Then went back to his house, waited for his auntie to come..

Went out for dinner at Vivo..The Imperial..

:)

Yes...I zhuan dao again...

The bill came up to about $400+

And when i heard his dad say..

My eyes widened till it nearly dropped..

And his dad saw it..

Sorry ah uncle..

I not trying to be so kua zhang la..

But i'm brought up eating zi char with bills coming at most to about less than $100?

And with my whole family...

IE..My bro and their wives..

11 people less than $100..

8 people $400+

See the diff?

Rich oso cannot lidat hua qian ma..

Haix..

As much as i know they are willing to pay more to get good food..

I saw abalone and sharks fin..

But i didn't order that...

All i asked for was some kind of soup with cooling effects..

Yes yes..

I'm stupid..

I should have asked for sharks fin..

I don't mind drinking canned sharks fin

I won't even order sharks fin when i'm with my own faily..

So, why would i order that when i'm with my boy's family..

Seriously don't want people to think that i'm with this guy cause his family is rich...

I know his dad is rich has nothing to do with him..

He's pretty broke actually..

Not a spoilt brat which i am half happy..

The reason why i am not happy is he's more than willing to spend..

Even though he's salary is only $500 a month..

And he would end up not having enough money to last for the rest of the month..

Anyway..

Went back home after dinner..

The whole house is empty..

My lao peh bu will only come back on Wednesday..

And baby is booking in tonight..

And he's like still sleeping at home at this time..

That's for reaching home only around 5am in the morning..

Haix...

Work tml and tuesday...

And possibly 8 days without having anything to do...

28th to 31st Comex Fair..

Thanks to Daniel for that lobang.. :)

And school's starting again on the 3rd of September.....

SIAN AH!!!!!!!

Last semester before i can graduate..

I lun..i lun..i lun lun lun...

Grrr...

I hope time pasts fast fast...

Faster graduate..

Faster find job..

伍家辉 - 虽然我愿意

伍家辉 - 虽然我愿意

请让我靠近你轻轻对你说

别让我每个夜为你受折磨

是多么不容易才默默放手

为了我就当作这次为了我

别让我因为你被回忆折磨

而空气凝结了我们的脸孔

我别无选择

就算我们之间有什么问题

依然想念着你

虽然被放弃

虽然我愿意

就算我们之间有什么难题

黑夜我还想着你

心碎人孤寂

虽然我愿意

再让我靠近你轻轻对你说

当我说我要你从此好好过

是真的否则我怎么肯放手

为了我就当作这次为了我

赐给我你现在幸福的笑容

别让恨冻结了我们的脸孔

请你做选择

就算我们之间有什么问题
依然想念着你
虽然被放弃
虽然我愿意

就算我们之间有什么难题
黑夜我还想着你
心碎人孤寂
虽然我愿意(心还想着你)

I'm so so so in need of a job....

Sian ah!!!!

Zo lang pai mia ah.. (*It's hard being a human...)

Bo gang zo sian.. (*No job sian..)

Bo gang lui nia ko ka sian...(*No salary to get more sian)

Haix...

Pardon me..

Not trying to be like some woman complining at the coffee shop using hokkien..

But really sibeh the sian..

Grr...

Confirmed with Janice that the counters are closing down this 20th...

And YET..She never inform us..AT ALL!!!

Till i sked..

Knn..

Hello..

I'm supporting myself..

I need money..

Howthe fuck can some company be so selfish and plan to tell the employees that we are given the sack so last minute..

Kana sai...

And i'm haveing my holidays...

Brrrrr....

Thought i could at least go JTC work..

At least i still have income..

Kana sai

End up too late...

And she still dare to bring it up tt they need temp staff..

Thanks for the help ah..

Next time check properly den say can..

Wad am i to do this holiday...

I fucking need money can..

I go collect cardboard la...

Kns...

Grr...

Going Phuture again tml with the same bunch of people..

Yes...It's boring...

I know...

Baby going MOS and i going Phuture..

For the first time we have our own entertainment for the night..

I just hope he'll just trust me..

gosh..

the whole world knows i won't be an unfaithful partner can...

But no worries...

No other guy can try to fuck me except u..Baby..

Oops...

Getting vulgar again...

But at least i dare say i don't sleep around..

Don care so much la..

Just try to enjoy my night tml and not think of anything...

Grrr....

Blabber blabber...

Just as i expected...

He's out again..

Called me before he went out to ask for permission to ride his bike...

Permission granted...

But am not allowed to speed nor drink too much...

Only one drink allowed....

Still..

Disappointed...

Dared to tell me that he and his friend rode at 160..

He said a car was near..

So..

Fine...not his fault..

I just hope he would keep to his promise to drink only 1..

HAIX....

Tml going to the hospital alone...

Expected..

Wonder if i want to go to his house after that...

Sian ah....

Parents going to Malaysia this weekend..

Friday my bro coming over to fetch them...

Coming back only next Wednesday or Thursday...

The reason i didn't go....

My sis-in-law's mother is going...

And i don't like it....Haiz....

Holiday~~~

My 3 weeks holiday have officially started...

Am i suppose to celebrate or something?

This is like the last holiday i'd be having as a student....

Hmmm...

But that isn't a bad thing though..

The worse thing is i'm losing my job...soon..

Since i heard the Sugar Baby counter at Bishan is closing down..

And possibly even the counter at Bugis is also closing down...

Expected though since the sales sucks...

Heard Bio-essence is taking over the area on the 20th of this month..

And yet.

My manager never even breath a word about it to us...

She could have left the schedule for the counters from the 20th empty...

But she still planned..

And worse i've got like 3 days at Bishan and that would mean i'd be losing.. $156 nett...

Duh.....

******************************

Completed the cross stitch meant for my baby..

Don't laugh..

I may appear rough but i'm still a girl after all.. :)

The problems that have arised before...

I shall forget about them..

At least for now...

And i hope i could..

Life has to carry on isn't it?

I'll just leave it to fate then..

What's meant to be,will be..

I'll just do what i should and can do..

Not do anything against my own conscience and that'd be good enough for me...

If fate wants to make a fool out of me..

Then so be it...

******************************

The end product....

Not very nice la..

But at least i can do it..

Hee hee...

I'm done with it and the whether he wants to throw it one side or hang it, it's up to him...

I just hope this piece wouldn't end up in the dust bin or worse..

In some other girl's house...

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The supposed promise....

Promises are meant to be broken..

Aren't they?

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Wonder if i'm meeting him today...

He's boooking out tonight and applied leave for Thursday and Friday..

Wonder if he'd be going out again tonight...

Wonder if he'd get drunk again..

Wonder if he'd be accompanying me on Thursday to the hospital..

I wonder...

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