She's at it again...

Didn't go home..AGAIN..

Spent the night out with baby's cousin..

What is this..

Just when she ended on fling..

She got onto another..

And i know this guy...

If it's bb's friend maybe i can still take it..

his cousin...

for goodness sake..

Bb was furious..

Dare not even look at him when he vented his anger the wall..

Felt so bad..

Shouldn't have asked her out the night before..

She slept with us at Bb's room..

She on the bed and we on the floor...

If i wasn't working i'd still be alright with them being alone..

But i was working...

Fucking no mood to work the whole day...

I should trust both of them..

I trust Bb more than i trust her..

Though i know her longer..

But given her character..

I don't know..

Something might or might not have happened between them..

I don't know..

I don't want to think...

Told Baby why i was so angry last night..

And he promised not to offer to put any other girl up..

Even if it's my best friend..

When i would not be around with them...

She came along again last night with us when Baby and i met up with his cousins again...

She was SUPPOSED to go home..

Was too tired to stay on when bb said to go home..

I trusted his cousin wouldn't do anything funny

And i entrusted him with the task to see her home..

Only to receive a call from Aloy to ask for her number..

And when she called and told me she didn't go home again..

And they are not at his house and isn't too sure where they are either.

I nearly fainted..

Could you PLEASE LOVE URSELF?

I din expect you to just sleep with a guy u met only twice...

And hello..

you have a boyfriend...

How could i ever face him again if he were to find out..

If he wouldn't find out i'd still have a serious problem trying to face him...

And the guy u slept with..

How am i to face him too.....

It was all my fault..

I couldn't even really face baby...

Shouldn't have asked her out..

And if i didn't..

These problems wouldn't be there..

Reached home at 1+ in the morning to find dad's room light still on..

He's lying on the bed and he said he isn't feeling well when i went to him...

What kind of a daughter would make her dad..

especially when age is catching up with him..

Wait for her to come home when he's not feeling well and need more rest...

I couldn't take it anymore..

I surpressed myself these 2 days..

And after these things happen...

My tears just came down without warning...

I'm a sinner..

I feel usesless....

It's said that everyone is alive for a reason..

What's mine then?

Why am i even living on this earth...

Why?